Wheels in the City

Image Series - Part II

2007-05-11T18:21:00Z

The Dilemma of a Politically Correct Mentality – Mouths motoring faster then minds

By Chantal Huinink

It is my understanding that the reason behind political correct language is to be as inclusive as possible. I am certainly in full support of this ideal however, I wish to bring attention to the fact that the integration of such practices only goes so far in the reforming of society and in reality many North American minds are not changing as fast as their mouths. The product of this is a seemingly two-faced society causing many negative effects because implicit misconceptions cannot be addressed.

It is not that I wish to shut down all attempts at political correction, I simply believe that society’s disapproval of an action is not enough to erase underlying beliefs, furthermore many aspects of societal beliefs including the stigma surrounding disability which are now deemed unacceptable need to be addressed before we can ever expect to coordinate our minds and our mouths and ensure that a device like politically correct language does what it is intended to do. In the meantime various actions can be tragically misunderstood.

Helpful strangers may refrain from offering to help disabled individuals who seem to be struggling because assuming they could use assistance is regarded as impolite. Also employers may feel the need to deny qualified applicants with disabilities a position simply because they are unsure how to accommodate them in the workplace and inquiring about such things (i.e. asking about the nature of their limitations) is now considered to be inappropriate or disrespectful by many. Able bodied people who have friends with disabilities may refrain from inviting them on an outing because they feel they might be inadequate at providing appropriate assistance or transporting necessary mobility aids properly. Meanwhile the disabled individual might be welcome if the they could arrange for accessible transportation, however such sentiment is unlikely to be expressed if one fears of being politically incorrect. These examples are meant to demonstrate that politically correct language does not always move us ahead, at times it stalls us at obstacles which would be relatively easy to overcome. In truth honesty can be brutal, but in many cases acting politically correct is impractical and causes more damage then good. Therefore neither solution is entirely positive but there is merit to the old addage “say what you mean and mean what you say”

On that note, keep on rolling in the city.

Image Series - Part I

2007-05-11T18:16:00Z

By Chantal Huinink

In the realm of disabilities there are a variety of impairments including physical, social, emotional, and intellectual disabilities, which create a wide range of capabilities. Some people with disabilities relate best to those facing similar challenges and interact primarily within the disabled community. This is particularly likely if their impairment spans many levels and establishing common ground with the able bodied population proves difficult. For the purpose of this column, I will refer to such people as “the relatively able, functioning in a disabled world”. Despite an impairment on one or more levels, others with disabilities identify most with the able bodied population and can interact with them to a much greater extent. These individuals could be characterized as “the relatively disabled, functioning in an able bodied world.” Neither classification is good or bad and many fall between these two categories. Each frame of mind proposed have both positive and negative implications in terms of striving towards ones full potential.

My physical limitations play a significant role in my daily life, and yet I can still relate to the able bodied population on social, emotional, and intellectual levels, as such, I fit somewhere between the two extremes. I can appreciate many experiences of the disabled community, however I also relate with the able bodied population to a large extent. As I experience both worlds, it seems more and more that I am only as disabled as I say I am and only as able bodied as I want to be. What I mean is that my skill level is highly subjective, though some limitations caused by spasticity of my arms and legs are blatantly obvious, other challenges such as dealing with a substantial visual impairment and understanding physical labour are invisible. Therefore in order for others to understand my limitations fully, it is up to me to be the one to communicate how exactly my challenges effect my daily experiences. The only problem is that since I have always had my disability I have no real way of comparing how much different I am from the general population. Further more as no one is able to understand the extent of my limitations for themselves, I’m never really held accountable for new skill development. Rather most people feel more obligated to change their expectations of me based on struggles I described as I encounter new situations. At times these struggles are just as likely due to a lack of practice, as they are due to the limitations that my disability presents. Nevertheless it is relatively easy for me to blame lack of success in many areas on some aspects of my disability, and thereby I have a seemingly valid excuse to refrain from further skill development. I think that it is especially easy to slip into this pattern when functioning as a relatively able person in a disabled world because of the fact that a great many experiences are adapted to suit ones own needs.

Alternatively when I am truly motivated to accomplish a task the challenges I have as a result of my disability will not cross my mind. I will persist despite several obstacles standing in my way and sometimes I am so motivated to accomplish a particular action that I will neglect to make intelligent adaptations which may cause me to act more efficiently. This could be the case if one identifies with the able bodied community so much that they fail to admit any challenges to themselves or to others.

The best strategy I have found for success at any task is to assume that I am one hundred percent capable and keep trying no matter what. In time if I do not develop the skills necessary to accomplish it I learn how to adapt or an observer provides insight into how I should proceed. By waiting on the insight of a third party my skill level remains unbiased, furthermore I avoid personal excuses which may or may not be misconceptions and allow opportunities presented to maximize my skills. In the end it should be your skill level which defies the challenges you face rather then your frame of mind defining your ability level.

On that note, keep on rolling in the city.

Wheels on the Water

2007-03-13T08:00:00Z

It may not be possible to walk on water, but I can most certainly roll across it!

I recently enjoyed the most pleasurable experience of my life, sailing through the Caribbean on a Carnival cruise ship. Surprisingly the trip was not greatly complicated by my wheels. I went through the same procedures, in the same time-frame, as anyone else who booked the trip by providing my travel agent with just one simple medical form. My attendant was also given a discount upon request.

Then the experience began. Not all Air Canada employees that I came into contact with were experienced in getting my wheelchair prepared for flight. However I was pleased with their willingness to assist me in all lifts necessary to transfer me from the airport to the plane and back again. Upon arriving in Florida I was pleasantly surprised that every city bus I spotted was wheelchair accessible. I found out that the accessible industry is much larger there because the demand is higher in Florida. My delight didn’t cease. I boarded the ship with ease and was further amazed by the accessibility built into the ship. There accessibility is based on the Americans with Disabilities Act, which means that locations designated as such, are not just technically accessible but are easy to navigate. My accessible room was equipped with a wider door as well as a roll in shower and grab bars in the bathroom. Ramps and elevators on the ship meant that I could access ten of the eleven decks. Hosts and hostesses in the dining room were mindful of my special needs and made it especially easy for me to enjoy meals.

As an added bonus, manual wheelchairs were available to explore ports that were not exactly accessible. The ship security staff were experienced in assisting passengers with special needs in getting off the ship in these locations. Four men lifted me in my borrowed chair down a flight of stairs, onto a smaller ship, so that I could enjoy the shores of Grand Cayman Island. Though my activities onshore were somewhat restricted, the denial of my participation in them was based on a lack of ADA approval for the excursion and I appreciated that I was not put in harms way nor frustrated by unforeseen obstacles.

The land restrictions were not as bothersome as you might think because there was an abundance of amusement provided on the ship. All the shows had accessible seating and I was welcomed to adapt any activities on the ship that were not entirely suitable. In having my chair onboard, the only problem I was not mindful of at first was that the electricity available on the ship was at a slightly lower voltage than on land. I had to be careful to charge my wheelchair more frequently than usual after the battery died on a pier of Costa Maya Mexico. Not that staying there would have been a horrible fate but I really wanted to get back and enjoy my five star, four course dinner that was included in my adventure. The bottom line is that it was an amazing experience and I would recommend it to anyone with physical limitations simply because the few obstacles I came across were relatively minor and did not impede upon my enjoyment of my holiday. Until next time, keep on rolling in the city and try rolling on the water if you get a chance.

~ Chantal

Wheels in Public

2007-03-06T09:00:00Z

The public persona of persons with disabilities has both positive and negative aspects that are probably evaluated differently by each individual on wheels. I am not like every other person with a disability nor do I wish to be associated with each one of them. I have become particularly annoyed with assumptions made due to physical appearance and/or abilities. So much so that sometimes I fail to recognize their legitimacy. I will examine these assumptions in order that only legitimate beefs remain.

In my teenage years I became particularly annoyed with a high school teacher who continuously confused me with another student in a wheelchair. Being especially concerned with preserving a unique identity I failed to recognize the regularity of his actions. Categorization and classification are unconscious activities of the human mind. Everyone performs them everyday. It was visible in my own life as I commonly confused people who had similar tones of voice or similar ways of walking. Looking back, having considered what I learned, I was surprised that he was able to acknowledge me at all. That being said, I am thankful that as people with various disabilities become more and more involved it becomes harder to classify everyone of us in a similar category and unique identities prevail.

Another pet peeve of the public persona is that when I meet people for the first time they will often assume that I know and have information to share about another friend of theirs who has a disability. I am aware that these are probably people that assume that their friend in Washington knows their friend in Texas, simply because they live in the same country. Furthermore I recognize that I do come into contract with and know more people than average from the disabled community. However people need to understand that just because I may ride the parallel transit with someone does not mean that we have anything in common besides physical limitations. Therefore the extent of our communication might be small talk, if that. Still, because of the age of political correctness I should not expect to be exempt from this social faux pas. Therefore have no valid reason to over re-act to such silly questions.

When people get to know me, I want them to see my unique qualities. But in my view the public should be public and I sense a definite lack of anonymity on such occasions where it seems that people can instantly recognize me, even if I have no idea who they are. Such phenomenon can not be blamed on any individual after all large objects, such as wheelchairs, tend to stand out. In addition motors that make noise will be noticeable. Also accessibility in extremely visible locations such as the front of lecture halls makes in-conspicuity impossible. I mean to alert society to the fact that sometimes blending in is valued and it might be worthwhile to develop technology and accessibility arrangements that are not so open. I also mean to alert the disabled community to the fact that whether you want to be or not you will be noticed so represent the group well, and keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal

Diminished Romance

2007-02-27T09:00:00Z

Let’s face it; although I recognize the importance of physical attraction and eventual intimacy in serious relationships, I rarely express myself physically. Emotional and psychological aspects of a relationship are far more important to me. That is not to say that I don’t desire a physical component, rather I value the fore mentioned components more.

Furthermore, I see the development of emotional and psychological dependence as a legitimate romantic relationship. In my experience some are led to view the relationship differently due to the lack of a physical component (or ignorance of the fact that a physical component is indeed possible as time goes on). Others I know have withheld the possibility of anything physical as it allows them to view the romantic connection as non-existent (dare I say there are people in the world who do not want to be caught dating a person in a wheelchair). The fact is that even though I place greater value on emotional and psychological connections with my partner that does not mean that I do not desire physical intimacy at all. I was once proud that a fellow student who is extremely sexually active asked me to gratify him sexually. Although I would never accept his inappropriate request I appreciated that he saw fit to treat me like he would anyone else.

I have had the pleasure of dating individuals with and without disabilities and I consider each experience valid in its own right. Though I do not know exactly what the perfect match looks like, I have learned a lot from each experience and have no doubt that cupid will get to me eventually. He just may have to try a little harder to penetrate my wheels.

In the meantime I remain aware of factors such as compartmentalizing, pressure-cooking and diminishing relationships which can cause problems in romantic development. If you have been frustrated by love in the city or a lack thereof know that others have had similar experiences. Take heart, learn from my mistakes and keep on rolling in the city. You never know when cupid may strike.

~ Chantal

Romantic Relationships in the Pressure Cooker

2007-02-20T18:34:00Z

Sometimes I feel that my wheelchair is an unwanted shield against cupid’s flaming arrows. In this column I intend to shed light on frustrations faced by many with disabilities in the romantic realm. As I mentioned in the last edition, sometimes I wish that I could wear a sign advertising the fact that despite my disability I experience the same thoughts, feelings and drives as anyone else

It is not that I wish to invite promiscuity or that I would accept just anyone as a partner, but I wish to de-escalate some of the drama surrounding romantic behaviour of those with disabilities. I suppose that I should be thankful that I am hardly ever seen as just another piece of meat and rarely objectified by men who just want sex. In our society it is socially unacceptable to take advantage of the disabled girl and I appreciate that every man who has expressed interest in me has done so in a genuine manner. However despite its benefits, the extra importance placed on romantic relationships with the disabled also has its drawbacks. Romantic offers are less frequent for most and every romantic endeavour is automatically under greater pressure to succeed because more aspects seem to be pre-calculated. I mean that potential partners usually must come to terms with challenges and realize that those challenges are outweighed by similarities before expressing interest in a relationship with a disabled individual. The irony is that the people with disabilities are more likely to face more challenges as the relationship progresses in accounting for their physical limitations.

Developing a relationship, where a person with a disability is involved, may be more complicated as certain stipulations, such as the need for attendant care, a lack of spontaneity or a simple inability to participate in various activities, may be presented. Adapting may make the relationship slightly more difficult than most. As such I believe the harsh reality is that a couple, where one or both parties have a disability, may be more prone to failure than other relationships. The end result therefore is either the deepest happiness or the deepest heartbreak.

~ Chantal

Wheels on TV

2007-01-26T09:00:00Z

Modern medical technology has saved the lives of many born with or later acquiring a disability. As the incidence of disability increases in our society so too does the appearance of wheels on TV. So this column is dedicated to how the small screen is affecting our image. When embarking on this topic I was fully aware of the fact that people on wheels are hardly victims of the media. The media stereotypes, distorts and exploits virtually every minority on a regular basis. Much of the following discussion could be applied to other minorities in society.

When I was younger every public-service image included a person of every race and of course someone in a wheelchair. To my knowledge there aren’t many current characters on wheels, however it appears that the barrier of political correction has been broken as people using wheelchairs have been placed in random roles. Examples include lawyer Jonathan Ashworth in Judging Amy; Kevin, the eldest brother, in Joan of Arcadia; and Stevie in Malcolm in the Middle. There is also a series devoted to characters using wheelchairs called Quads. There are several ways to view these images. In one light I see them as normalizing disability and supporting their recognition in society. In another light I see them as misleading and categorical. I think the problem lies in limited character development. Although I appreciate that writers integrate characters without drawing undue attention to their disability, it creates problems when trying to present the whole picture.

In my experience wheeling characters fall into one of three categories. The first is demonstrated by the Jonathan from Judging Amy. His character uses wheels and yet appears virtually unaffected by his disability. This scenario showcases a capable individual and serves to normalize disability however the portrayal is misleading. If a disabled individual held a similar position in real life it is likely that they would encounter secondary challenges not mentioned in the series, such as difficulty in navigating around small offices. There might be more value in illustrating real challenges and contributing to public awareness rather than creating unrealistic expectations of many with disabilities.

The eldest brother portrayed on Joan of Arcadia, is a well-integrated character on wheels. He demonstrates the problem faced by many accident victims of overcoming anger and bitterness caused by the loss of ability. However it is unfortunate that other character traits seem to be neglected. Despite struggles faced by anyone they always have more than one dimension to offer. With viewers only seeing that one dimension they may expect the same behaviour from all members of that minority.

The third category represented on TV, are those whose challenges are exploited for comic relief. I value the fact that some TV shows do not exempt those with challenges from the development of humour, after all I want to be treated like everyone else. Having said that, there is no reason that those with challenges cannot be a part of able-bodied jokes and their disability does not have to be at the centre of every spoof.

Perhaps instead of examining how minorities’ images are distorted on the small screen, we should spend more time looking at the bigger picture of how the small screen is affecting the views of society.

Keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal

Evolving Identity

2007-01-23T13:46:00Z

As a child, my disability never factored into my self-concept. Reasons for this were not that I was unaffected by it or that I refused to admit it to myself; I simply didn’t make the connection between things like my many doctors appointments and my wheelchair, or my educational assistant accompanying me to classes and my special needs. As well until I was about twelve years old, none of my drawings included my wheelchair. My self-portraits typically showed me skipping or running along. This is how I saw the world around me and how I understood myself.

It wasn’t until adolescence that I began to recognize that there was more to the picture then I had previously thought. As qualities like athleticism rose in value and homogeneity of social groups became important, my challenges and differences from the majority confronted me. I wasn’t sure that I could measure up anymore so I retreated to a network of disabled friends whenever possible. There I derived solace from feeling equally capable again. Yet I felt awkward, as our relationships were based only on physical capability or rather the lack there of. My self-identity within the group was not at all related to my previous self-concept. When I realized this I became fearful that my wheelchair would be all that anyone saw and that the rest of my picture would fade away. In an effort to shed light on the rest of my self and preserve the identity I grew up with or at least gain respect from the masses, I refused to do anything that could fit-in with stereotypes of the disabled. The only thing wrong with this was that in doing so I discounted positive aspects of my disability such as accessible sports, like wheelchair basketball, as well as the ability to understand and advocate for minorities.

I am just now coming to understand that to be the most fulfilled is to embrace all aspects of your identity and I suggest that you do the same. Keep on rolling in the city and good luck finding a way to balance all that you are.

~ Chantal

Wheels in the City from a Different Perspective

2006-12-19T18:49:00Z

In my experience with the able-bodied public, most do not have a very thorough understanding of accessibility. However many remark that it only took slight contact with a wheelchair user, or a brief experience in a wheelchair themselves, for them to recognize barriers in our society. Therefore being confronted with accessibility and technological issues early on, you might expect my family to be among the most aware. However, growing up accustomed to such issues causes my relatives to tell a different story.

Throughout childhood I was particularly close to a cousin who was eighteen months older then me and due to a number of common interests, we remain close today. She says that there are always obstacles. Her familiarity with my disability has simply made her more conscious of how to get around them. She finds it hard to comment on how our experiences were different from anyone else’s and points out that when she was little; she assumed that everyone had a cousin in a wheelchair. Looking back, it is obvious that our childhood experiences were somewhat different and pointing out the unique aspects might be valuable to others.

Most young children spend their time burning off as much energy as possible. Sometimes an older family member would set me in the middle of the action so I too could participate in such energetic games. However, the migrant nature of such games made continuous involvement difficult. So my closest cousin and I spend much of our time on stationary activities. I’m not sure what possessed her to lift me up one day, but we were about nine when she decided that if she wanted me to be where the action was she would have to find a way to get me there. It seemed precarious as first. To anyone else it might have looked like a recipe for disaster, but to us it was a valuable mode of transportation in un-wheelchair accessible houses. In a short time we perfected a technique where my feet where barely off the ground, and she could barely see where she was going. As we grew she developed a profound understanding of my limitations, how my limbs operate and how my chair works. Over time our technique has improved, and to this day friends are amazed at how easy she makes moving me appear to be.

The great thing about my cousin is that it never occurred to her that my life should be any different then anyone else’s. She recalls one childhood incident when she was confused because a stranger passing by handed her a dollar to give to me. She said, “If people knew your life was as good as mine they wouldn’t feel sorry for you.” She has no problem helping me with things that others might regard as less important for a “disabled” person - such as hair and makeup - because she’s only ever compared me to other friends and family who do such things regularly. She assumes that if I can’t do something she would do, I must want or need help doing it. Her attitude is very refreshing because it shows she respects me as much as she would anyone else.

So keep on rolling in the city with all the respect you deserve.

~ Chantal (Inspired by Laura Huinink)

Expressions of Encouragement

2006-12-05T16:15:00Z

Thus far I feel I’ve made the most of my capabilities, but I can also understand why people feel the need to encourage me. I know many see me as someone who is continuously overcoming the obstacles and beating the odds. Such people are very impressed with my accomplishments at university, and are even surprised by my ability to live independently. So it’s unsurprising that on various occasions, friends, family and strangers too, have felt the need to express their encouragement.

Although these gestures may be very genuine and I make an effort to accept them graciously, they make me feel quite uncomfortable - after all, this is my life. From my perspective, I am simply going about my days, doing what I have to do to live like many others. I am making the most out of what I have, and being or doing anything less really seems foolish to me. That’s why I am often unsure of what to do when people go out of their way to encourage me.

One stranger in particular caught me off guard - she was wowed that I was shopping in the dollar store by myself. The fact of the matter is, I may need help from various people for many things, but I am also capable of many things, and I do not believe doing them is a very great accomplishment. The fact that anyone would expect less from me is a scary thought. If I did succumb to my limitations then what would become of me? This is a question I often ask myself, because it is no joke.

Sometimes I do struggle, and doing as much as I would like to is very difficult; but in the end, the effort I put in is worth it because there is nothing better to do with my time. It is almost as if the end justifies the means - that is to say, if I relinquished my active lifestyle in the hopes of minimizing struggles, I would have no productivity to show for the hurdles I would still inevitably face. My accomplishments make the challenges I encounter in the midst of everything even more worthwhile.

So keep on rolling in the city, and know you are capable of much more then what it takes to make people proud.

~ Chantal

Why I’m Glad My Wheelchair Says it All

2006-11-22T14:39:00Z

There are reasons why I don’t like labels, and there are times when I wish I was capable of more. But they say a picture speaks a thousand words, and when I am confronted by my limitations I am glad my wheelchair does some of the talking.

In a busy store I don’t have to explain why it takes me longer to grab my change. In fact, I’m sure some customers withhold rude comments they would otherwise say to me if it wasn’t for my wheelchair. When I am navigating my way through a crowd, people know enough to clear more than two inches; actually, they’re more likely to give me extra room. Finally, if I cross the street really slowly, people know better than to honk at me. Some will even jump out of their car to ask if I’m okay. These scenarios, and many more, point to the fact that my chair says many things - “be patient”, “don’t make her struggle” and “she might need assistance”. My chair gives me some power to act atypically, without social repercussions - a fact which I greatly appreciate. Still, I try not to abuse the privilege, because I know that without it I would suffer the wrath of many on a daily basis. I consider it a luxury, not a right.

I have some friends who, due to a slight difference in their limitations and / or a sheer act of willpower, choose not to use a mobility aid, even though they go about their day more slowly and struggle with certain tasks more than I would. As a result, the general public will hurry them along or become frustrated by them. My question is, if people do not carry on that way with me, why do they feel compelled to do so to others? There is no need to wait for obvious signs of disadvantage before acting considerately; it is not beyond our capabilities to act compassionately toward friends, families and strangers alike.

So if you use a wheelchair or another prominent mobility device, do not assume that the compassion you receive is simply owed to you because of your disability - such consideration should be universal.

Until next time keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal

My Chair is Not a Weapon

2006-11-09T16:02:00Z

Ever since I was little, my chair has been many things to me. I was brought up to understand that my disability wasn’t going to get in the way of anything I set my mind to, and my chair enabled me to do many things. If I was “walking” with others, it was thought of as my legs. If my friends were biking, it was my bike. Of course it never actually transformed, but I used it in many contexts.

There was one thing my family warned me against. My chair was not to be used as a weapon. This was because other kids could not defend themselves against a four horse-powered, motorized vehicle, with sharp edges. This rule didn’t mean much to me in early childhood. After all, I wasn’t going to go around saying “give me your lunch money or you’ll have to answer to four horse power”.

Throughout childhood, my wheelchair did not factor into my reactions to others because I knew it wasn’t supposed to. It wasn’t until I was much older that my friends improved in athleticism, and my lack of physical resources created a power struggle in many practical joking situations. For example, they could run up and turn my chair off and I would do nothing because I didn’t want to be unfair. After instances like these continued it occurred to me that they were using all their physical resources, while counting on the lack of mine.

In everyday life I would not use my chair as a weapon; however in situations where people are using their physical capabilities at my expense I have come to see no problem with using my chair as a resource. When I first did so my friends were shocked, but it went a long way in levelling out the playing field, and making practical jokes fun for both sides. It’s all in good fun, for example no one should be at risk of severe injuries, but now my friends respect that if they’re giving me a hard time, I can give them one back.

Wheelchairs are meant for physical equality, not weaponry one-up-man-ship. Therefore using your chair recklessly and/or seriously injuring someone is not justifiable. However if someone is using their physical capabilities to make your life more challenging, I would say that using the resources your chair provides to challenge theirs is a fair adaptation.

Until next time keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal

Labels That Say Too Much

2006-10-20T16:04:00Z

We live in the age of political correctness - one where medical breakthroughs have made us aware of many reasons for various disadvantages and new disabilities. In many cases, people have struggled all their lives with certain tasks and are getting tested for a range of “disorders” well into their adulthood. They end up with a label that explains to them exactly why they’ve been struggling for so long and appropriate concessions can be made in various settings.

In such cases, labels are a good thing. I am certainly thankful for the accommodations made on my behalf. Were it not for things like text books on tape - which I am allowed to receive due to my label as a visually impaired student, I might flunk out of school because I am certainly not able to read all the textbook material. Therefore the label of visually impaired, provides me with an equal chance to achieve what someone who does not have a visual impairment could.

The problem with labels is that the special consideration taken by others often go above and beyond the ramifications of the disability. I most definitely require large diagrams on exams to account for may visual impairment. I also require a scribe to account for my fine motor difficulties. But I get annoyed when professors offer me things like one sheet of notes to help my memory in the exam. The few who have done so, have done so to be nice, but it bothers me because, in my opinion, overcompensating for my challenges undermines what I am able to accomplish without special consideration. Furthermore by overcompensating for the challenges of many people who have disabilities some achievements are invalidated to a degree.

The negative effects of labels aren’t only external. Once a person is labeled, the tendency is not only to accept concessions due to their disability, but to lower their expectations of themselves, assuming that they do not have to or they cannot get better. In my experience there are very few things that can’t get better if you work at them.

So if you’re going to take a challenge; grab it by the horns regardless of your disability. Who knows, if you’re able to achieve it despite your disability, the accomplishment might be that much more rewarding. Don't let labels say too much.

In any case, keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal

Living with Others - Including the Disability

2006-10-20T16:01:00Z

My roommates are great people. We have a lot of fun together, and to them I am just one of the crew, even though they’re all able to walk and I am not. They know most of my limitations and do not appear to be bothered that I do not do as many chores around the house as they do. Mind you this may be because they know I do what I can. Nevertheless, I think a major factor in the success of our living arrangement has to be their easy-going and compassionate natures.

They understand that I need to keep certain mobility aids in the bathroom and others around the house, as well as the fact that I need to have attendant care providers coming and going at various times throughout the day. These aspects of my disability do not faze them; however there are limits to anyone’s understanding. My roommates do not understand any details of my personal care, nor are they privy to any remnants of my health care routines lying around the house. It is not as though I go to great lengths to hide such things and I’m sure they’re not oblivious, but I make an effort to be discrete because I know that they are aware of all that they could need to or want to be.

They’re able to relate to me just like they would any friend or housemate because we have mutual respect and a reciprocal connection. However my discretion is vital because they don’t show me their private routines nor do they see personal care routines of their other friends. Also, other friendships do not usually involve the willingness, let alone the desire to share such personal information. If I did so, I do not believe we would relate in the same way. I don’t consider myself any different. When I do bring my disability into the forefront I find they treat me differently. It is not as though they do not want to interact, but they seem to act more consciously or assume responsibility for given situations. We get along great because although my disability is included in everything, I have been able to show them that we are much more similar then we are different and usually they see right past my disability.

If physical challenges are a part of your reality, keep in mind that you are much more similar then different from those who can walk. It is possible to go beyond the disability while still taking physical challenges into account.

So until next time, keep on rolling in the city!

~ Chantal

Inability Does Not Mean Incompetence

2006-10-02T13:48:00Z

Planning leadership development for 15 and 16-year-olds for my job this summer was an internal struggle for me. I knew that physical activity and athleticism had to be part of the program, as many of the participants were very energetic. Furthermore, I knew that due to my physical limitations I would not be able to participate in some leadership training that would be very valuable for able-bodied kids. I set out to include such programming because I wasn’t going to let my disability get in the way of a beneficial experience for them. However it was a struggle for me because I also wanted to convey the idea that I would take an active role in their development, and I would be there for them no matter what.

When they went off to do maintenance projects and other things that were not accessible to me, I found myself feeling negative about the extra work put on my co-leader’s plates, as well as the fact that I could not support the kids I was in charge of in every single situation. I wondered very much if it would not be better for them to have an able-bodied leader who would be there for them at all times.

Then I came to two major realizations: First, I could convey willingness even though I was not able, by being with them regardless of whether I could do the work they were doing. Second, I was not hired to be physically adept. I was hired to do what I can do and do it well. I identified with the kids and expressed interest in the experiences that I could not be a part of by having them describe them to me. In this way they also furthered their communication skills. In time I realized that my role was very different from those of my co-leaders, even though technically we had the same job descriptions. While a co-leader led the kids for walks through the woods, etc, I was able to support those who weren’t up to it. It became a very rewarding balancing act that met the needs of many.

So might I remind you, inability doesn’t necessarily mean incompetence! Your inability to perform certain tasks might make you well suited to others.

Until next time, keep on rolling in the city.

~ Chantal