In my experience with the able-bodied public, most do not have a very thorough understanding of accessibility.  However many remark that it only took slight contact with a wheelchair user, or a brief experience in a wheelchair themselves, for them to recognize barriers in our society.  Therefore being confronted with accessibility and technological issues early on, you might expect my family to be among the most aware. However, growing up accustomed to such issues causes my relatives to tell a different story.

Throughout childhood I was particularly close to a cousin who was eighteen months older then me and due to a number of common interests, we remain close today.  She says that there are always obstacles.  Her familiarity with my disability has simply made her more conscious of how to get around them.  She finds it hard to comment on how our experiences were different from anyone else’s and points out that when she was little; she assumed that everyone had a cousin in a wheelchair.  Looking back, it is obvious that our childhood experiences were somewhat different and pointing out the unique aspects might be valuable to others.  

Most young children spend their time burning off as much energy as possible.  Sometimes an older family member would set me in the middle of the action so I too could participate in such energetic games.  However, the migrant nature of such games made continuous involvement difficult.  So my closest cousin and I spend much of our time on stationary activities.  I’m not sure what possessed her to lift me up one day, but we were about nine when she decided that if she wanted me to be where the action was she would have to find a way to get me there.  It seemed precarious as first. To anyone else it might have looked like a recipe for disaster, but to us it was a valuable mode of transportation in un-wheelchair accessible houses.  In a short time we perfected a technique where my feet where barely off the ground, and she could barely see where she was going.  As we grew she developed a profound understanding of my limitations, how my limbs operate and how my chair works.  Over time our technique has improved, and to this day friends are amazed at how easy she makes moving me appear to be.  

The great thing about my cousin is that it never occurred to her that my life should be any different then anyone else’s. She recalls one childhood incident when she was confused because a stranger passing by handed her a dollar to give to me. She said, “If people knew your life was as good as mine they wouldn’t feel sorry for you.”  She has no problem helping me with things that others might regard as less important for a “disabled” person - such as hair and makeup - because she’s only ever compared me to other friends and family who do such things regularly.  She assumes that if I can’t do something she would do, I must want or need help doing it.  Her attitude is very refreshing because it shows she respects me as much as she would anyone else. 

So keep on rolling in the city with all the respect you deserve.

~ Chantal (Inspired by Laura Huinink)