Finding Balance Between Special Needs & Special Treatment

As a person who depends on a wheelchair I can tell you firsthand that having a disability makes life challenging. I don’t think anyone would argue that those of us who must use wheelchairs, electric scooters, canes or walkers to get around have it easy by any means. However I’ve seen the reactions and heard the mutterings of disapproval from those who witness me getting what they deem as “preferential treatment” - I can think of one instance when I was moved to the front of a very long line at the OSAP office at my university. On the other hand, I’ve also seen many people applauding this special treatment - to the point of offering it up when it’s completely unnecessary.

These negative and positive reactions to my disability often leave me pondering if there’s a way to balance the scales between “special needs” and “special treatment”? Is there any hope of finding real equality between the two?

In the past, I’ve been approached by many people who’ve said they’re delighted to help me whenever possible. They rationalize this because aspects of my life seem a lot harder than theirs. However, I’ve also been confronted by the complete opposite. People who witness much of the special privileges that I receive and complain that they are given randomly, unnecessarily, and at times even unfairly.

When I think about it I can understand both points of view, but I don’t believe either one is totally justified. I can tell you that I often accept almost any special services I’m offered without giving it much thought. This is simply because these special treatments typically make a significant difference in my daily life. However, it still leaves me wondering if the special treatment I receive hurts others in any way? It also leads me to ask the ever-lingering question - where do the scales between special needs and special treatment balance out?

The Special Treatment Argument

In my experience, I sometimes receive special treatment because of displaced compassion. What I mean by “displaced compassion” is that I’m often offered special privileges that have nothing to do with my disability. For example, a while back, I was bumped to the front of the line while waiting for an autograph from my favorite band. These kinds of genuine gestures tip the scale of equality in my direction a great deal. Some would say this is unfair preferential treatment; while others would argue its necessary favoritism.

I admit, oftentimes assistance isn’t really necessary. However when it’s offered, I take advantage of it because it allows me to put more energy towards greater struggles. A good example of this would be when people feel obliged to open doors for me or to give me access to reserved computers in the library, even when they’ve been waiting in line longer than I have. These sorts of privileges make a significant difference in my daily life. If someone opens a door for me or lets me use a reserved computer, I can get things done a lot faster, because time isn’t a luxury that life in a wheelchair allows for. So these sorts of favoritisms leave more time in my day for other tasks that I normally wouldn’t be able to find the time for.

In my next column I plan to continue our examination of special needs vs. special treatment by giving insight on the “special needs” side of the scale.

On that note, keep on rolling in the city.